I love learning, honing my skills as a Collaboratively trained family law attorney and mediator, and bringing new skills to the table!
In 2024 thus far, I’ve continued to learn more about the Insight Approach to Conflict Resolution, as a curious mediator, diving deeper into the theory and the practice. In other blogs and social media posts, I’ve mentioned the challenge and difficulty in learning this wise, comprehensive approach like here and here and here.
As I reflect on my skill-building for the year, Insight remains the strongest area where I am continuing to grow. I wish I had more time to read because there’s a lot of material about the Insight Approach for resolving conflicts, though I am conscious all the time about practicing the curiosity piece and wondering more instead of assuming I know what is best for my clients.
I’ve noticed the reaction from my colleagues when I’m asking more questions. Some are supportive, saying, “oh, that was a brilliant question!” as they see our clients reflect and open up their communication about an issue. And others are resistant, thinking I’m wasting our time by probing deeper.
Photo by Tingey Injury Law Firm on Unsplash
Part of the Collaborative Law Divorce Process is being committed to clients driving the decisions, as opposed to us telling them what to do. I ask questions to help them find out what information they need so they can make a decision. How can you make a beneficial decision without all the necessary information?
In litigation, I was always the attorney known for attention to detail, and it annoyed a number of my colleagues on the other side. But I have to practice in the way that I know to be in my clients’ best interests!
Some colleagues have said, supposedly in jest (but I know better!), that my attention to detail drove them crazy. But that’s why clients come to me. I often operate in ways different from the way most attorneys practice, but I believe in my commitment to my clients. Annoyance may come from not really understanding the process of the Insight Approach, so I invite colleagues to participate alongside me many times!
I’ve expanded my skillset this year in other ways, too, largely due to free webinars offered by the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals. As busy as I am, I make time to attend monthly opportunities for professional development.
No matter how long I practice family law, I know I have more to learn. It makes me a better lawyer and fills my skillset with options to benefit my clients.
One more thing I’ve learned this year is that most people who come to me want to use the Collaborative Law process to divorce. Often, their spouses do not. That’s frustrating, but I am so heartened to see a growing desire to divorce through a Collaborative Legal Process. I look forward to the time when more attorneys are on board to close the gap in ways to approach Family Law.