Taking Divorce Virtual

Taking Divorce Virtual

Taking Divorce Virtual

How a Jameson Law Manages a Virtual Divorce Case in Colorado

This blog first appeared on the website for the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals. Read the original blog here.

In the era of COVID-19, everyone is using virtual meeting software to conduct business. However, my Collaborative Divorce colleagues and I were already doing it. 

A Case Follows Its Clients

This case began in the typical in-person format in Michigan. The husband met with me several times over nine months as he contemplated filing for divorce. Shortly after it became clear that ending the marriage was his next step, he and his wife decided to sell their home and move to another state, where two of their married children live.
virtual
It is not like any case can go virtual; attorneys are bound by the parameters of the State Bar and can only practice in states where they are licensed to do so.

Based on my state’s laws, if my client moved to Colorado and then filed for divorce, I could not represent him.

But he wanted to work with me in a Collaborative fashion on his virtual divorce. Accordingly, we filed in the state of Michigan before they moved, which relegated the case to the state where they had lived during their marriage.

Committed to the Collaborative Process

They agreed to proceed in a Collaborative fashion, and the wife hired Collaborative Divorce attorney, Tucson divorce attorney. We created a team that included divorce financial planner Jacqueline Roessler and divorce coach Judith Margerum. Everyone agreed that this case would be conducted through video conferencing.

virtual

Photo by CoWomen on Unsplash

I assumed the professionals would be together in one place, and the parties in another place, but this did not happen. For scheduling convenience, each professional joined from her own office, and our clients were in their home in different rooms.

As the case progressed, I thought it would be better for the team to gather in person, especially for a pre-meeting and a debrief after the client meeting. As it turned out, due to the pandemic, we connected via our own shelter-in-place locations.  

Meeting Virtually

For the most part, the virtual divorce case proceeded beautifully with Zoom as our means for communication and meeting. There were drawbacks of course. For example, it was harder to take side meetings with a client or team member on Zoom. However, it was possible using the Breakout Rooms feature.

On the positive side, the Collaborative tone remained in this virtual format.

Collaborative Focuses on the Family

As usual with Collaborative Divorce, we were able to focus the process to suit the family. This family was in transition, so we created virtual meetings to accommodate their desire to move, rather than having to wait for their divorce to be final in Michigan.

Another plus is that you can see people’s reactions and responses, which is crucial for the mental health professional on our team. While we cannot read the energy as we would in-person, we can still see, really close up, each face.

And, scheduling meetings is a breeze – no need to plan around drive time or calendar conflicts.

Today’s technologies make it easy to expand our Collaborative world while still getting the same great work done.

Here are some tips for making video conferencing work for divorce law cases.

Z
Pay attention; make sure you are looking at the screen. People often get distracted during a video conference and might look to another screen, thus missing reactions and responses.
Z
Because everybody is on a computer, the person taking notes can type it on their own device. I could look at the meeting and type while it was going on.
Z
It is easy to record the meeting for future review. People sometimes forget what they said or agreed to, or perhaps different parties have different interpretations of the proceedings. Having the ability to record the meeting eliminates confusion. Professionals should be aware of the most current privacy standards that apply to them in regards to use of this technology, specifically around recording. In addition, mental health professionals may need to determine whether their technology platform is HIPPA compliant prior to hosting or recording meetings.
Z
Choose a platform that you’re comfortable with. We use Zoom, but there is also GoToMeeting, AnytimeMeetings, and others. Choose one that offers the option of breakout rooms.
Z
Be prepared. Learn how to share your screen, know the software, know the technology before the meeting begins.
Z
Plan your pre-meeting and your after-meeting, especially if professionals are not in the same room. Planning is still very important.

Read more about Collaborative Divorce

The Changing Legal Landscape

The Changing Legal Landscape

The Changing Legal Landscape

During this time of pandemic shutdowns, legal process and procedure were forced to change.

Suddenly, we had no choice but to practice differently, and the court system had to accept drastic changes to legal processes. The way we always knew to practice law simply does not work in a pandemic.

Is Change Good?

I’ve pondered whether this change prompted all of us in the legal field to become more creative. Or did it just bring us into the 21st century? Are we finally embracing a new face of law that was inevitable, but which we resisted until we had no choice?

This happened in a lot of industries and fields. Companies that did not embrace work-from-home did so quickly and completely to protect the health of employees and clients.

Surprisingly, they found productivity did not wane! In many cases, productivity improved because people were trusted to get work done and do it well.

legal landscape

Image by Ohioduidefense from Pixabay

How Divorce Law Happens

The legal field is an interesting mix of independent and communal work. A lot of my work happens in my office, on my computer, pulling research and precedent and templates to create motions, judgments, and other written pieces of legal process.

There is also work I cannot do alone. For litigation cases, I must appear in court, beside my client.

Their spouse must appear as well, with his or her attorney. We appear in a court room, before a judge, with the courtroom clerk, Friend of the Court representatives and witnesses, too.

That’s a lot of people in a small space. In normal times, there are also other people awaiting their turn before the judge

legal landscape

Photo by Headway on Unsplash

We all show up in a closed room without windows, waiting for our turn to be heard.

That’s just one example of how divorce law can be a very in-person process. But in a pandemic, all that had to change to keep people safe.

We’ve discovered that cases get done anyway, even in totally unprecedented conditions.

I wonder, will divorce law remain a distance activity?

The court has started live streaming legal proceedings out of necessity. Might we continue once it’s safe to gather again?

A New Approach to Family Law

Or, are we finding new efficiencies that we want to keep going forward, independent of public health mandates?

People are historically resistant to change. We know what we know, and we are comfortable in familiar routines.

But change is the only constant, and when something changes, we end up better for it.

There is no question that something is lost when we cannot gather together. But perhaps something is gained, too.

Read more about the Legal Process

Facing Zoom Fatigue

Facing Zoom Fatigue

Facing Zoom Fatigue

Remember the days when we had time before and after a meeting to prepare and process? There was no such thing as “Zoom fatigue” back then, and oh it seems a distant memory!
With all the virtual meetings of the last few months, I’m starting to forget the rhythm of the pre-pandemic work day. While I prefer in-person meetings, I am becoming more comfortable conducting business remotely.

Building a New Normal

There is really no choice! We spend our days now on Zoom or FaceTime because it’s the only way to be with others, safely.

Recently, I had a conversation with some colleagues about how we are so much more tired at the end of a day now. And yet, we haven’t gone anywhere!

So why are we so tired? 

Understanding Where Energy Comes From

I posed this question to a colleague who specializes in Co-Parenting counseling, Jordana Wolfson. A social worker, Jordana explained that it takes a lot of energy to participate in virtual meetings because we cannot pull energy from others in the room.

People-to-people interactions have an energy that we miss when we sit alone at the dining room table. That’s why co-working spaces like WeWork became so popular.

Millennials and Gen Z professionals were already comfortable working remotely. They were good at staying connected with friends across the country via video chat. Professionals of a certain age (like me!) did not grow up with this.

Drained by Zoom fatigue, we are realizing just how much energy we draw from being in the same space as others.

zoom fatigue

Jordana Wolfson, social worker
Co-Parenting Solutions LLC

Will This Be Our New Normal?

This may be a new face of work going forward, even after the pandemic ends. But we must find ways to fuel daily energy without depending on others in the room.

Maybe the new normal will be more about balance – finding a balance between working from home and being at the office, spending time with family and friends versus being a workaholic, eating out vs. eating at home.

Perhaps we’ll be more selective with how we choose to spend our time, drawing energy less from the work day and more from life itself.

Read more Off Topic posts

Taking Divorce Virtual: How a Michigan Collaborative Team Manages a Case in Colorado

Taking Divorce Virtual: How a Michigan Collaborative Team Manages a Case in Colorado

Taking Divorce Virtual: How a Michigan Collaborative Team Manages a Case in Colorado

This blog first appeared on the website for the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals.

It’s ironic that in the era of COVID-19, everyone is clamoring to use Zoom and other virtual meeting software to conduct business, because I and my colleagues in Collaborative Divorce were already doing it.

This case began in the typical in-person format in the state of Michigan, with the husband meeting with me several times over the course of nine months, as he contemplated filing for divorce. 

virtual divorce

When it became clear that ending the marriage was, indeed, his next step, he and his wife had already decided to sell their home and move to Colorado, where two of their married children live. 

It’s not like just any case can go virtual; attorneys are bound by the parameters of the State Bar and can only practice in states where they are licensed to do so. That means if my client had moved to Colorado and then decided to file for divorce, I could not represent him, even from afar, with so many great technological tools. 

But because we had built a relationship, and he wanted to work with me in a Collaborative fashion on his divorce, we strategically filed in the state of Michigan before they made their move, which relegated the case to the state in which they’d lived the duration of their marriage. 

They agreed to proceed in a Collaborative fashion, and the wife hired a Collaborative Divorce attorney, Symantha Heath, and we pulled together a team that includes divorce financial planner Jacqueline Roessler and divorce coach Judith Margerum. Everyone agreed up front that this case would be conducted through video conferencing.

virtual divorce

I assumed the professionals would be together in one place and the parties would be together in another place, but this did not happen at first. For scheduling convenience, each professional has been in her own office and our clients are in their home, in different rooms.

My feeling as the case progressed was that it would be better for the team to gather in person, especially to guarantee we have a pre-meeting and a debrief after the client meeting ends. As it turns out, due to public health parameters, we must connect via our own shelter-in-place locations.

For the most part, the case is proceeding beautifully with Zoom video conferencing as our means for communication and meeting.

There are drawbacks of course – for one, it’s harder to ask to take side meetings with your client or another team member when we are on Zoom but possible using the Breakout Rooms feature which I only recently learned about during an IACP call (“A Candid Conversation About Collaborative in Trying Times”). 

Prior to advancing my Zoom knowledge base, participants were asked to leave the main meeting and then texted or emailed when we were ready for the group to reconvene. There is definitely a learning curve as with all new technology. 

On the positive side, the collaborative tone stays the same in this virtual format. We can bring in professionals from anywhere – there is a mental health professional who moved to California that I used to work with all the time, and Zoom allows me to pull her in if I deem it necessary.

Also, we were able to fashion the process to suit the family. This family was in transition, so we were able to create virtual meetings to accommodate their desire to move when they wanted to move, not having to wait for their divorce to be final in Michigan before they moved. That could’ve delayed their move a year or longer.

Another plus is that you can still see people’s reactions and responses, which is crucial for the mental health professional on our team. We can’t read the energy as we would in-person, but we can still see, really close up, each face. And, scheduling meetings is a breeze – no need to plan around drive time or calendar conflicts, especially during these times.

Today’s technologies make it so easy to expand our Collaborative world while still getting the same great work done. 

virtual divorce

Here are some tips for making video conferencing work for your cases.

Z
Pay attention; make sure you are looking at the screen. People often get distracted during a video conference and might look to another screen, thus missing reactions and responses.
Z
Because everybody is on a computer, the person taking notes can type it on their own device. I could look at the meeting and type while it was going on.
Z
It’s easy to record the meeting for future review. People sometimes forget what they said or agreed to, or perhaps different parties have different interpretations of the proceedings. Having the ability to record the meeting eliminates any confusion.
Z
Choose a platform that you’re comfortable with. We use Zoom, but there is also GoToMeeting, AnytimeMeetings, and others. Choose one that offers the option of breakout rooms.
Z
Be prepared. Learn how to share your screen, know the software, know the technology before the meeting begins.
Z
Plan your pre-meeting and your after-meeting, especially if professionals are not in the same room. Planning is still very important.

Read more about Collaborative Divorce