It’s a natural instinct to protect the people we love the most. Sometimes that is a parent, sometimes a friend, quite often, especially when contemplating divorce, you want to protect your children.

People decide to divorce for different reasons, but one common thread that binds those going through or having gone through divorce are their feelings about how it will affect their children. Divorcing adults are united in their desire to protect their children from hurt.

It’s so common for people to stay in unhealthy or unhappy or loveless marriages because of their children. They want to give their children a stable, nuclear-based family to grow up in.

Some people stay because they are afraid of the financial changes that inevitably come with divorce.  With a future of unknowns, a parent may think that staying married is the better option. They want to protect their child from all possible pain points that results from their parents splitting up.

We put this perception of hurt onto our children before it ever happens. Some children may move through a divorce without such scathing hurt after all.

I know the decision to divorce is a tough one. Deciding to divorce is difficult and not to be taken lightly. From talking with clients over the years, I hear the biggest hesitation is how a divorce will affect others – children, aging parents, in-laws.

Don’t let that drive your decision.

Everyone hurts at different times in their lives. We can all get through it together and emerge on the other side, stronger. People get beyond the hurt.

Do what is best for you because in the end, it will be best for your family.

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