Nonattachment to Outcomes

by Alisa Peskin-Shepherd | Jun 12, 2017 | Legal Process

As attorneys in Collaborative practice, our outcome is the clients’. They are in control. Yes, we mind the process, facilitate negotiations, and provide information so clients can make informed decisions.

In a court case, the aim is to win, emerge victorious. Not in Collaborative. Collaborative divorce law hinges on achieving a win-win for both parties, and the attorneys letting go of outcomes.

The journey is the process, if you will. It’s a paradigm shift, but it is a founding principle of the Collaborative approach to family law.

We give control of the outcome to the clients because it’s their show.

We want the best for each spouse and actually mean it.

We empower them to make good, sound decisions that they will not regret years after the divorce is final.

We look at the big picture of a family’s life and work together to create a landscape that allows for as much happiness as possible for all parties.

As attorneys, letting go lets us gain so much more than we could have imagined. Think about the energy shift in avoiding argument and acrimony in exchange for peace of mind and knowing you did what was needed to help a family thrive.

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As we watch or listen to the confirmation hearings for Supreme Court nominee, Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson, I want to finish off Women’s History Month by paying homage to the powerful women who have led our nation’s legal thinking – and broken through previously thick ceilings to get there.