In The Room Where It Happens
Can you feel the energy?
Can you see it pulse in the sky, beneath the clouds? Can you feel it emanate from the person seated next to you?
Is your energy swirling in the middle of your rib cage? Do you feel a vibration when you’re sure you’re sitting still?
Energy is powerful, and it’s all around us.
If you can tune in to the energy in the room when you’re going through a divorce, you will be in a better position to succeed both during the process and once it’s finished.
There is your energy, of course, which comes as a result of your emotions, fears, and apprehensions. When you can breathe deeply and calm yourself, your energy will be more balanced and fuel you for positive negotiations, leading to livable outcomes.
But the energy of others – that is something you cannot control.
You can, however, avoid responding to it.
Energy affects the process. You can either let it happen unconsciously or you can notice it, recognize it, and accept that it’s there. When you do that, it can’t control the process.
A lot of people think the idea of energy and its power is hokey-pokey, but all I can tell you is if you go to a true energy healer who is a medium, you can feel the energy as it’s moving.
Have you ever participated in that popular ice breaker where everyone stands in a circle and you hold your hands up to the people next to you, not touching, just to feel their energy buzzing? It’s real.
There is an energy around us to take with us wherever we go. It is a very real thing. (In fact, read this article about what some are terming the “Big Divorce Energy” of 2019.)
Some people believe we are energetically entwined with people we’ve had strong or long relationships with. There is a practice known as cord-cutting where you cut the energetic cords connecting you to that person, thereby freeing yourself from the hurt of the past, once and for all. (Read about it here.)
Many ancient religions believe in the energetic pathways and the need for healing when our energy is corrupted or broken. Some people believe the individuality of humans is an illusion and all that we are is energy. (Have I totally lost you on this woo-woo stuff now?)
Understand how to move and manipulate your energy.
I bet you know something about what I’m saying, even if it’s just on the surface. You know when someone comes near you and has bad energy. You don’t want to be around them. They bring you down. You automatically navigate away from them, and eagerly await their departure.
That’s bad energy.
If you feel your energy is stagnant, stuck in a place that is not positive, or you’re having trouble moving out of it, perhaps it is time to seek out someone who works with the energy in our bodies, an individual licensed in healing touch therapy or reiki.
Healing Touch Therapy
I’ve done this, and it helped immensely. The first time I availed myself of energy work with an energy healer (the energetic therapy modality), I was litigating a terrible custody battle with an attorney who was an all-around bad person. He and his client exuded so much meanness, it was hard to fight it and to stay balanced and separated from it even in my personal life.
My healing touch therapist worked with me and my energies to keep them in a good place and gave me insight and tools to stay in my own positive space.
More recently, feeling overwhelmed and out of balance, after trying so many ways to move forward, I just felt that something was stuck somewhere around the center line of my body, from my heart down to my hips. I went to my energy healer and in fact there was a lot of energy not moving in the meridian; she moved it, got it flowing through my body again, and since then I feel that I am moving forward, things are happening.
Every few weeks, I return to her to keep that energy flowing. (Interested? I highly recommend my energy healer, Nancy Zucker.
Likewise, when someone comes near you with positive energy, you always want them by your side. It’s infectious. You want to be like them.
Energy matters. Being aware of your energy state, and of those around you, during a divorce is the best way you can navigate your divorce process with keen vision and practical strategy to come out on the other side proud of what you’ve managed to achieve, ready to start the next stage of your life on strong footing.
(Read about energy healing here.)
Read more Off Topic posts
The end of a calendar year is a good time to reflect on what matters to you. Whether you’re going through a divorce or not, checking in with your priorities and how they inform your life decisions is always time well spent.
November is often considered a month to focus on gratitude, and I believe gratitude and patience are important assets in divorce. First, you can’t be angry and appreciative at the same time. One must outweigh the other.
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